UC Berkeley is Stealing From Me!!!

So I just went and got my transcripts for applications to grad school. Guess how much each copy was. Go ahead. I'll wait a second...

WRONG! It was $20 per copy. Factor in the fact that each school wants two copies and we have a grand total of $140 dollars to apply to 4 schools (UCSD was the only one sane enough to only ask for one... that earns them some points in my book). I need another 12 copies I just couldn't bear it.

Factor in the $12 I had to pay for the luxury of finding out my score to the GRE test and the $6 per call charge to add more score reports with the $15 each for every school you send your score to and soon it's well over $1000 to apply everywhere.

Dammit!

These bears aren't just stealing pic-a-nic baskets!

Firing People is Funny

Check this out:

Oct. 20 - Keasey is signed to the 53-man roster from the practice squad and Navies is waived.

Oct. 22 - Navies is signed to the active roster and Keasey is waived.

Oct. 24 - Keasey is signed to the practice squad.

Oct. 27 - Navies is waived and Keasey is signed.

Oct. 30 - Navies is signed, Keasey is waived.

As of Thursday, Navies was a member in good standing on the 49ers' 53-man roster, preparing to play Sunday in Atlanta, while Keasey was back on the practice squad earning $4,500 a week

Read all about it here.

Name that Cycle #1

Due to overwhelming popular demand, I'm introducing a new spin off of Name That Equation. It is entitled Name that Cycle. Go ahead, give it a try...

Name That Equation #1: The Answer...

Well I'd be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed in your piss-poor guessing. As the picture suggests it was obviously Schroedinger's Equation. Yeah that one! One of the most fundamental and most interesting equations in Physics!!!!

So let's see what some of you blood oranges guessed:

1) "this is a stupid feature." - Machiavelli
Well I have a response to that. You're a stupid feature. For one thing you're dead and your website is getting destroyed by a much better one.

2)" the speed of lightning in water" -Machi-dumb-velli
Well where to start with this one. I assume you meant the speed of light in water which is simply c/n = 2.25 x 10^8 m/s, where n is the index of refraction of water (which is 1.3333). You are so pathetically stupid it makes me want to buy a landfill just so I have a place to put this junk. I hate you so much. I'd hope you were dead if you weren't already ( and had been for the last 500 years).

Why Do They Suck?!

A simply question really. Why can't the 49ers get it together? Why? They only lost one player (Antonio Bryant) who missed half the season anyway. And he was not exactly one of a kind. They could get another player like him. Heck they have one, they just don't use him (I'm looking at you Ashley).

Name that Equation #1

Introducing a new feature, entitled Name That Equation! I will somewhat often post an equation and see who guesses first. Whoever guesses first will win the pride attached to such an honor including a mention in the body of the post of the next post.


You might have to ask your feline friend for help on this one.

12/10 is less than Perfect

So many of you have probably been wondering about how can my reviews make any sense since I somewhat routinely score things higher than a 10. Allow me to explain my rubric:

Firstly, you sock cuz you don't understand it. Second, the 10 is really just a kind of a scale height of a score, rather than a maximum. Think of it like this. If the scores for a random population of movies were to expressed as say frequency of score = A exp(-x^2) [scaling to some mean value as its center of course] then 10 would be approximately where the the frequency of the score dropped to a value of exp(-1)*A.

I hope that helps.

Robert's Review #3: Pathfinder Misleads Me

It's a story about Vikings...

No not those Vikings... Nevermind, let me just start by quoting the back of the DVD case:

"Experience a new world of graphic, hard-core action with this Unrated Extended Edition of Pathfinder - packed with extreme battle footage not shown in theaters, plus an army of kick-ass deleted scenes and special features!"

Got the picture? Good, cuz now I know what I'm in for. A movie with blood flowing and insane , muscle-pumping blood-boiling gore that was too brutal to be seen in theaters. Unrated Gore Even!



No not that kind of gore...

First begin there are a couple of featurettes included with the movie but I cannot begin to call them an army of kick deleted scenes and special features. It also wasn't really that incredibly super-violent. Sure people were killed (I mean heck they were Vikings) but it was not super over the top. Not even the level of 300.

Well let's get on to the review without further ado.

Plot: 1.5/2 Interesting take on an old Native American legend that perhaps has a basis in actual history. However don't let that scare you, there is plenty of action. Good pacing keeps this story moving and interesting. However a little predictable

Originality: 1.5/2 While this is a remake of another film, this is one of the best adaptations of a 1987 Norwegian film I've seen in months. In actuality the story is new and presented in a way that doesn't feel entirely too campy. It was fresh but not groundbreaking.

Actiing: 2/2 Solid acting all around. Plus it had Clancy Brown in it (Lex Luthor from Justice League) who is an all around amazing actor. Although for some reason I don't understand Karl Urban is always in these kind of movies (like in Chronicles of Riddick, Doom, Lord of the Rings, and some others I cant remember [he was also frequently in Hercules an Xena])

Cinematography: 4/2 Wow! Well they actually stunned me. This movie had a feel and it ran through the whole movie. The angles and shots were innovative and made this movie just fun to watch. However without this, the movie would stuggle to be anything. It had an identity that made is pleasure just to watch.

Execution: 2/2 Solid for the reasons listed above. Clean and crisp.

Bonus Points: 1 It gets one for just how awesome they portrayed the Vikings.

Total: 12/10 A solid movie that was pleasure to watch. However it was not the bloodbath it tried to bill itself as. I think it would have had more success if they had billed it as what it was. A movie in a similar vein of 300 (it was even made into a graphic novel) in that it has utterly brilliant stylistic choices, but is vastly lower on the the bloodometer (seen to the right).

All in all very good and worth the watch.



The next movie to be reviewed very well could be one that was so great that the largest image on the back cover is that of a rather drab menu with the caption: "Interactive Menus" scrawled beneath it....

Robert's Reviews #2: Dr. Strange or just Dr. Misunderstood....?

Well, it looks like Marvel Animated Features has done it again, with their recent foray into the Sanctum Santorum of the Sorcerer Supreme, Dr. Strange. (no I did not make all that babbling stuff up, that's what this thing is full of ... and I love it.) So where to begin? How about the beginning?

Well this movie (unlike other previous sock-worthy submissions from the same company) starts you out in the middle of a high powered mage-shadow beast fight that has the fierceness of a Tijuanan cock-fighting ring and the ingenuity of an electrical engineering college kid on crank.

You know what I loved about this movie that I thought was a huge step in the right direction? The exciting battle that appears on the back cover of the box actually occurs during some point of the movie ( You could learn from that Mr. Stark [by the way Mr. Stark is a reference to Tony Stark { Note to the uninitiated: Tony Stark is Iron Man}]).

I do have to admit that I was more interested than I thought I would be in this Dr. Strange flick and was not disappointed. In fact, I dare say this is the best movie about the Sorcerer Supreme ever made, yes I do believe it beat out the 1978 TV movie starring Peter Hooten as Doctor Strange.

So without further ado here's the review....
Plot: 2/2 A solid and interesting story (it even had a couple of twists in it). Good groundwork in the beginning paid dividends towards the end. This is how a comic book movie should be. It doesn't rush the origin story but still delivers and engaging and entertaining storyline

Originality: 2/2 Ok so this wasn't the first (or last) Dr. Strange movie, but the storyline and the interpretation of the Sorcerer Supreme was refreshing and interesting. I especially enjoyed the way how they dealt with how magic worked in the movie (not the accept the unacceptable stuff) but instead I was enjoyed how they gave each character a sphere of influence. A common mistake in this kind of movie is to not put restrictions on the abilities of the characters which leads to an inability to create an interesting and exciting fight scene. One must be able to see that a character is not omnipotent to care about him.

Acting: 2/2 Well everyone was solid and there were no outlandishly bad standouts that detracted. (this is in general the criteria for a 2/2 although superb acting can give bonus points in the lightning round)

Animation: 3/2 Well it was pretty amazing. From the initial fight scene throughout it was of top quality. There were also no severe jarring transitions from CG to drawn images. The character designs were all spectacular reimaginings of what one can only consider awful source material (case in point Dormammu aka ball face). I especially enjoyed the effects for all the crazy magic that was always going on. It was clean, cool, and not over the top. Excellent.

Execution: 2/2 Pretty amazing considering this is a Doctor Strange movie. Excellent development of the characters as well as amazing animation. Overall very well done and completed well.

Bonus Points: 0 Being a movie about Dr. Strange unfortunately forbids me from granting any bonus points for awesomeness. That's unfortunate because it would have deserved them.

Total: 11/10 It was good, really good. Need I say more. It revived my faith in Marvel Animated Features. I haven't looked into it but this might be an entirely different team than the ones that worked on that Iron Man debacle, but if its the same people then kudos for the turn around. If they're new then kudos to Marvel for dropping those other losers.

If you like comics then this is probably a must see. It's better than any of the live-action stuff they've made. Bravo Marvel Animated Features, Bravo.

You'll want to get it for more than just the Video game cinematics it comes with...

Upcoming Duet Post

So boys and girls (and owls [ha ha Home Improvement Reference]) I've got some big news for you. Just in time for the Boxing Day rush, there will be a special cross-over (or X-over if you prefer) between this awesome sight and the struggling Lamest Thoughts Ever Blog in a special presentation of the review of Marvel Animated Features Dr. Strange. In much the same vein as Capt. Jean Luc Picard appearing in the first episode of Star Trek Deep Space 9, or Worf appearing in Star Trek Deep Space 9, or 7 of 9 appearing in Star Trek Voyager, (or Worf permanently appearing in Star Trek Deep Space 9, or William Shatner appearing in the Blockbuster Star Trek: Generations , or the one episode where the USS Enterprise visited Deep Space 9 and that stupid genetically enhanced doctor named Julian helps out Geordi with some garbage in Engineering for some reason and Data started getting some dreams with this crow and he paints all this stuff [also a blacksmith] and it turns out to be his father), this site will bail out Machievelli's lame site.

So keep your eyes peeled and stay tuned...


(As a side note, the DOOM movie review that you've all been anticipating will be delayed indefinitely for technical God Mode related reasons.)

Robert's Reviews #1 : The Impotent Iron Man?

To start things off let's begin with a special Comic-Con exclusive sneak peak review of Marvel Animated Features' Invincible Iron Man.

Let me just save us all some time and begin with this statement.
Throughout the agonizing and plot-hole ridden 83 minutes of this cinematic abortion filled with nothing by bad acting and what can only be considered sloppy workmanship ( I mean I wouldn't sit in chair made like this for fear of my life), nothing even remotely as interesting or well-thought out as what appears on the back cover of this box occurs during this movie. There is no climatic fight sequence, no climax, no buildup, nothing really except for the feeling you've lost an hour and a half of your life and that you feel as dirty and shameful as if you were dragged through 3 feet of raw sewage throughout the entire course of your career as a custodian at a strip club.

Plot: 0/2 Well, where to start, really... Despite chronal anomalies that would give even Gene Roddenberry fits, there really is not much of a plot (such as building an entire suit of armor and what appears to be at most a couple of hours with basically a hammer and some sheet metal). Some nonsense about some ancient prophecy (which seems just like an excuse for some eye candy fights) not much really happens and what does happen shouldn't have happened. This would have made a better movie, just a black screen. Then maybe I wouldn't have been fooled into dropped $15 on this piece of garbage.

Originality: 0.25/2 Well, this isn't the first Iron Man Movie or the last . At least it was a story I hadn't heard before (even if it was hackneyed). Although it involved the Mandarin who was basically his sole enemy in the '90s cartoon. It's hard to believe.

Acting: 1/2 To be honest there was nothing great nor nothing particularly bad. Totally Mediocre.

Animation: 1.5/2 Well, it looked nice except for the somewhat shabby transitions between obvious drawn and obviously CG scenes and characters. That's a pretty big pet peeve of mine. But that isn't the animation quality's fault, just a lack of taste.

Execution: 0/2 Well first of all who allowed this non-story to be made into a movie. Let's get something straight. I love some terrible, arguably some of the worst, movies ever made but this suffers from what can only be described just not being quite a movie. Perhaps it is Parts 1-3 of a four part episode of Iron Man the cartoon show but this is just not complete. The special effects were as described before poorly sown together (like a jacket I tried to make once out of legos). At least I don't seem to remember anything memorably bad or good about the music.

Bonus Points: 0 Being a movie about Iron Man, this movie is not eligible for these bonus points.

Total: 2.75/10 One of the worst movies I've seen I can't believe I bought this the week it came out. I was so excited and looked forward to this junk. If only marvel would put this kind of money into a solid animated x-men feature or a new tv show. It took what seemed to be a good franchise at Marvel Animated Features (which made some pretty solid Ultimate Avengers movies) and has managed to drag down my expectations for the upcoming Doctor Strange movie about everyone's favorite arrogant neurosurgeon.

I'm afraid I'll have to give this Robert's Sock of the Month.

You SOCK Invincible Iron Man.


Next Issue: Look forward to my review of Doom the movie. Yes they made it into a movie and prepare to be shocked by my review... Or you're DOOMED...

Robert's Reviews #0 : Preview

In what is sure to become this season's hottest new item, I have decided to begin a new segment entitled "Robert's Reviews".

Each movie or television show will be scored based on the following categories:
1) Plot
2) Originality: ( Creativity / Artistic Integrity)
3) Acting
4) Cinematography / Animation
5) Execution : ( Direction/ Music /Special Effects / etc.)

These will be graded for up to 2 points each on a ten point scale with an additional:
Bonus Points / Lightning Round) How Awesome It Is

Please submit suggestions for movies you would like to see reviewed.

There will also be a Robert Sock of the month which is a particularly bad movie.

This Stuff is Worth Money?!

So I was playing my castlevania game on gameboy and considered purchasing the ps1 game castlevania:symphony of the night, only to find it was running about $60 on ebay and amazon. This encouraged my to look into some other rpgs that I actually own and determine their values. Here is a list of games I know I own and how much they have sold for on ebay

1. Final Fantasy VII $80 (VIII and IX each I think were about 40)
2. Brigandine $ 65-80
3. Suikoden $56
4. Xenogears $40 (I think my copy has a $8 price tag on it from The Wherehouse)

So I considering I will most likely never play any of these games (and in general I got them all used for less than $10 (except the final fantasies) I think these were a good investment.

Take that sports games....

So I Guess I Finished that Final

It took me 13 days but I did it...

In other news I haven't been up to too much. My finals and grades all went well. I'm rather pleased (and if I'm pleased that means something).

Right now I'm working up at the lab again, but this time I'm a lot more dedicated because I know this is my last chance to do research before I apply for grad schools. I've got a lot of stuff going on but it should all work out.

Oh well that's all for now.

About to Take a Final

111 Final Project Done

As the title suggests somewhat seductively I have finished my 111 project and after finals this Friday and Saturday I should have some more time (at least until I start working in 2 weeks)...

Memnar The Magnificent #4

The final ranking of the NFC West this season will be:
1. 49ers
2. Cardinals
3 Rams
4. Seahawks

It's Not Too Early

Mike Nolan Cheats During Draft!

It is a little known fact but there is a reason that the draft has time limits between picks. It adds to the excitement and keeps things rolling but most importantly it keeps anyone from thinking through everything and making good choices.

I hereby suggest that Mike Nolan has been cheating by spending extra time in a timeless dimension immediately adjacent to ours. To him time passes normally but upon his leave of several years, only a blink of an eye occurs in our world. For evidence I produce the following 2 pictures of Mike Nolan. One 3 years ago when he became coach of the 49ers and one this Saturday after he picked Patrick Willis. Decide for yourself.




























Also look at this most recent photo of Mike Nolan:

Hectic Week

So I've been working on my Final Project for my Physics Lab Class and that has taken up just about all of my time. Sorry about that.

In other news, it looks like the 49ers finally have some a full team with even a little depth with the following Quality reasonable to be starting players:

6 linebackers[Willis, Smith, J. Moore, B. Moore, Lawson, Banta-Cain]

4 Cornerbacks [Clements, Harris, Spencer, Brown]

3 Safeties [Roman, K. Lewis, M. Lewis]

2.5 Defensive Linemen [Young, McDonald, Franklin] (Young counts as a half because he's so old, see picture to the right)

5 Offensive linemen [Jennings, Allen, Staley, Smiley, Snyder]

.75 RB [Gore] Too injury Prone to be considered safe with no real backup. Breathtaking as long as he stays healthy

1.5 QB [Alex Smith, Dilfer]

1 TE [Vernon Davis]

4 recievers [Lelie, Jackson, Battle, Hill]

1 FB [Norris]

2 Sp Teams [Nedney, Lee]

This is a SOLID starting group with plenty of room for rotations in the Linebacker and Reciever positions. The 49ers have the best secondary they've had in a decade and it looks like they could have a serious chance of winning the most competitive division in the West and in the NFC, the NFC West...

P.S. Has anyone grabbed David Ball yet?

P.P.S. Who is returning kicks for us? That I think is our current worst position and could end up biting us in the end.

49ers Make Huge Pre-Draft Trade

The 49ers in what can only be called a magnificent display in the sports world have worked with the bottom rung Sea Devils to pick a self-described "Terrell Owens", Marcus Maxwell. In exchange they gave the Sea Devils some tips on not being so lame. Sources say they will most likely not follow them.

Read the whole story
here:

(Note how he never mentions the Sea Losers, also note how this 49er mentioned the Rhein fire [a better but still lousy team].)

Memnar The Magnificent #3

The 49ers will trade Smiley to the Denver Broncos to gain their first round selection.

Memnar The Magnificent #2

Patrick Willis will not be on the board at the #11 pick.

Versus #2: Alan Branch vs. Patrick Willis

Memnar The Magnificent #1

The 49ers move up to the Redskins pick to grab Landry.

Versus #1: Christmas vs. The NFL Draft

This is part of a new feature where you are free to discuss both sides of the issue in the comments section.

Stolen Horse Drives Meachem to Greatness, Madness

Here are some excerpts from a story about Robert Meachem. (Read the Whole Story)


“I played running back when I was little and my dad actually used to throw me in the ring with the bulls to see how fast I could run,” said Meachem. “They’d come at me and throw their head and I’d take off, but then they really didn’t try to chase me too hard. It’s much better making a defender miss. That might be the best feeling in the world when you are on the field.”





"As a kid growing up in Tulsa, Oklahoma, Meachem had plenty of farm animals to keep him company including his best friend, a horse named Little Man.

“I had him since I was about three years old and he was always with me,” said Meachem. “I taught him everything. He knew how to shake your hand, he could shoot the basketball off his nose.”

While a teenager, Meachem was devastated when his beloved horse was stolen.

“I was so mad and frustrated,” recalled Meachem. “We always had a whole lot of horses but he was mine and after he was gone, I just never felt the same about another horse and really didn’t care to ride anymore.”

Instead Meachem spent more and more time involved in athletics, splitting time throughout high school between both basketball and football. A point guard for Booker T. Washington’s two-time state basketball team, Meachem finished his senior season as an all-state first-team choice after rushing for 531 yards and eight touchdowns and racking up 543 yards through the air with another ten scores."

If it wasn't for that horse, he wouldn't have spent those years in college...

Revised Draft Needs

What do the 49ers really need?
3 things (arguably in this order):

1) Defensive Line
You need a stout line to run a 3-4. For 2 years Nolan has wanted to run this type of Defense but has been unable to because of Terry Donahue's undersized linemen. However they picked up Franklin at DT which could prove to be an excellent choice because it means that they don't absolutely have to take a lineman at #11. However they could really use Carriker/Anderson (later round Alama Francis) or Branch/ Harell.

2) WR
I have to say is that WR would be a bad choice for the 11 pick since all the receivers would be a reach at that point and to be honest there are plenty of good picks in 2nd and 3rd rounds. Plus we did add Lelie for a reason and if Vernon Davis steps up we might not have as large of need.

3) Middle Linebacker
Derek Smith may have led the team in tackles for a while, but he just isn't the type of explosive sideline to sideline player I would like to see playing for the 49ers in that position. I would like to see them pick Willis/ Harris/ Poluszny or later perhaps a Zak DeOssie

What would be nice to have?
1) Backup Running Back (splitting carries with Gore)
Maybe Jackie Battle
2) Offensive Line Depth/ Pass Protection
Ugoh/ Sears

Willis and Carriker? It Could Happen...

A quick review of the 100 or so mock drafts posted by reputable sites on thefootballexpert.com suggest that if the 49ers don't pick Carriker, he won't be picked until after the 20th. This suggests two things: 1) Carriker would be a reach 2) A draft day trade on order of last years could give them both

And if Carriker isn't there, how about Spencer or Harrell.

With a 10th and a 20 something pick they could do the following picks:

Willis, Carriker/ Spencer/ Harrell/Okoye

Branch, Harris/ Carriker/ Spencer

I'm not saying they should, but it is a possibility and with 10 picks, I hope the 9ers don't pick 10 players.

A Retraction

In a previous post I mentioned that the 49ers did not have a back up TE, I would like to retract that statement. They have an up and coming TE that I entirely forgot about, Billy Bajema. This makes the list of 49ers needs ever shorter.

*Also Delanie Walker is capable of moving to the TE spot.

Snoopy Confesses to Pedophilia, Being Lame

He must really like feet.

Happy Birthday to Me

Worst Birthday Present Ever

New Cat King Found, Promptly Crushed